The ‘I’ here may not be me, but it may not not be me either… (“I” need this shield of anonymity to ensure greater honesty)
A lot of things have changed since then, a lot. Then – when I was into it (from head to toe, with heart giving a lead) – I had no doubts whatsoever that I am in love. After many-a deliberations, to my dismay, I do have some reservations now. Well, on second thoughts (plz bear with me. I am not yet at peace with the matter completely, and seek to realize, myself, while I narrate. So there are bound to be second thoughts, and deliberations, and oxymoron.), even then, deep within, I had my doubts. But, then I believed what I wanted to believe – that it is but Love! And I did my bit to convince my conscious. Afresh from an all-boys residential, and hailing from a conservative small-town, I found my guide in Bollywood. I detested songs till then; each one of it now held a special meaning for me. I would sit in the corner of the TV room, smiling at the secret messages that the songs invariably had to deliver; and at the sheer ignorance of my peers at that. I would accompany the hero in his every mission to win Her heart; and rather sub-consciously, try to emulate his efforts.
I am not going to narrate an account of this one-sided affair here, for despite all wishful-thinking this may not be different or superior to just any other love-labour-lost saga, but I intend to discuss the implications and repercussions, and the life thereafter...
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Just Another Day..?!! - Part 1 (Prologue)
They say, words are mighty; I am scared of their limitations. True they can incite passion, carve destinies, move nations; they continue to be the most exploited of all resources at man’s disposal. But then, sample this -
A busy businessman while leaving for office runs into his son who’s just out of the bed. He brushes his hand through the kid’s hair impulsively at the sight of the cute 10 yrs old in his night-pyjamas struggling to wish him a good-morning through his wide-open, yawning mouth. Both of them smile instinctively at each other, and the dad catches the momentary twinkle in the lad’s eyes as the lids rise to meet his own... The whole sequence of events takes hardly a second. The man scowls at the driver for his shabby dress, he’s probably to receive some important guests at the airport today; and the child shrieks and run at the sight of his mother, she would force him into bathroom instantly…and neither of them, ofcourse, gives it a second thought. It’s too insignificant an event to find entry in the dad’s notepad, or the son’s new personal diary. But after an hour’s meeting (rather argument) with his impolite clients, and in the middle of negotiating terms with the revolting workers, if the dad closes his eyes with the desire of a momentary reprieve, it’s that same twinkle and the same sheepish smile that will best work to quench his quest. The child on his part is too naïve to realize his moment of bliss now, but it might have probably left a mark on his sub-conscious which may actually press sometime later when he’s on his own and the relationship’s under a lean patch; he though may not be able to relate things then, but that hardly matters.
Now how do you actually emphasize the importance of that one, apparently insignificant, moment in their life, without hoping to sound too rhetoric or too dramatic or hopelessly romantic…?! One needs to experience it to know it.
A busy businessman while leaving for office runs into his son who’s just out of the bed. He brushes his hand through the kid’s hair impulsively at the sight of the cute 10 yrs old in his night-pyjamas struggling to wish him a good-morning through his wide-open, yawning mouth. Both of them smile instinctively at each other, and the dad catches the momentary twinkle in the lad’s eyes as the lids rise to meet his own... The whole sequence of events takes hardly a second. The man scowls at the driver for his shabby dress, he’s probably to receive some important guests at the airport today; and the child shrieks and run at the sight of his mother, she would force him into bathroom instantly…and neither of them, ofcourse, gives it a second thought. It’s too insignificant an event to find entry in the dad’s notepad, or the son’s new personal diary. But after an hour’s meeting (rather argument) with his impolite clients, and in the middle of negotiating terms with the revolting workers, if the dad closes his eyes with the desire of a momentary reprieve, it’s that same twinkle and the same sheepish smile that will best work to quench his quest. The child on his part is too naïve to realize his moment of bliss now, but it might have probably left a mark on his sub-conscious which may actually press sometime later when he’s on his own and the relationship’s under a lean patch; he though may not be able to relate things then, but that hardly matters.
Now how do you actually emphasize the importance of that one, apparently insignificant, moment in their life, without hoping to sound too rhetoric or too dramatic or hopelessly romantic…?! One needs to experience it to know it.
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